Think back to when you were young…
Remember when all things seemed possible, when life stretched before you like an endless road? You had hopes, dreams, and plans for the future — and you were certain that nothing would get in your way.
But then life happened, with its unexpected detours. Some were good, some not so good. Failed relationships, demoralizing jobs, and mounting responsibilities took their toll. People told you that the dreams of your youth were foolish and naive — you needed to “get real” and “just deal with it.”
At some point, you made an agreement with yourself that those people must be right. What made you think that you were special? Why couldn’t you just accept that who you are and what you have are all that will ever be?
Still, deep down, you wonder, “What if?” What if those people were wrong, and you somehow could get back on that road you once envisioned and realize some of your long-ago dreams? Well, I’m here to tell you that you can! How do I know? Because I’ve been there, and I’ve experienced it myself.
I’m Pam Mattys, a certified life coach and workshop facilitator
You can read about my story in detail here, but let me give you the basics: I’m from Hawaii, a place that will always be home to me, and I currently live in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. I’m happily married, and I have two grown sons. I enjoy cooking, travel, crafts, reading, music, and relaxing with my husband and our various pets.
I spent most of my career as an executive administrative assistant, supporting senior leaders at such organizations as the Federal Reserve Bank of San Francisco, Intel, and the Chief’s Office of the Portland Police Bureau. I retired in 2018 to pursue what I’d long known is my true calling: helping women work through their life challenges and reach their highest potential. Life coaching has helped me work through my own challenges, and now my goal is to pay it forward.
I’ve always been a deeply spiritual person. I’m a Christian, but I respect all faiths and philosophies that are based on love, respect, and forgiveness. I’m also a practical person. I was a single mom for over a decade, I’ve navigated the invigorating but sometimes treacherous waters of high-level corporate and government organizations, and I’ve had to adapt to cultures that were different from the one in which I was raised.
Like you, I have many facets. I can be a strong, bold, confident warrior woman — but I also can be a small, frightened, insecure little girl. We’re all complex, flawed, amazing human beings — and, at different points in our lives, we all need help figuring out who we are and where we need to go. If you’re at one of those points, I can help!
My areas of expertise
Finding your purpose in life
I believe that each of us was put here for a reason. Unfortunately, we weren’t born with a piece of paper telling us what that reason is. Some people seem to know from an early age, focusing on what it takes to reach their goals. Most of us, however, take years, often trying to be what other people tell us we should be. I can help you figure out who you truly are and what you’re meant to be — and how to become that person.
Swimming with the sharks (without becoming one or being eaten by them)
Are you in a hostile work environment, with a toxic culture, a bully boss, or coworkers who are trying to sabotage you? Do you despise corporate politics but realize that you can’t avoid them? I’ll teach you skills to navigate the shark-filled waters while remaining true to your values — and to make the sharks respect you, if not necessarily like you.
Supermom! — The myth
I’m sure you’re heard that “you can have it all”: relationship, career, motherhood, volunteer work, hobbies — because you’re an Empowered Modern Woman. So why isn’t that happening for you, especially if you’re a single mom, trying to juggle family and career? Because “having it all” (at least all at the same time) is a myth. I’ll help you prioritize, do the best you can, and not beat yourself up for what you can’t do.
Being a stranger in a strange land (even if it’s your own land)
Do people tell you that you’re too sensitive, too nice, or an “odd duck”? Do you have trouble relating to those around you? Maybe you’re from another culture, or you just have a unique personality. Problems often arise when people make incorrect assumptions about one another’s words and behaviors. You can learn how to fit in and still be yourself.
Sister, you’re stylin’!
Are you concerned about your clothes, your weight, your height, your mannerisms, your personality, your hairstyle, or any or all of the above? If so, are you concerned that maybe you’re being narcissistic by being concerned about such things? Don’t be — there’s a difference between being self-obsessed and wanting to look and act your best. I’ll help you discover your personal style.
When you’re older, you can wear purple (or any color you want to)
George Bernard Shaw said, “Youth is wasted on the young.” If you’re, um, of a certain age, you’re probably wondering how to remain relevant in our youth-obsessed culture. There was a time when age and wisdom were revered and respected. We mature folk have much to offer, and it ain’t over till it’s over. As we say in Hawaii, “We’re still yet good.”
Breaking self-defeating behaviors
Do you continually resolve to eat less, exercise more, drink less, switch to a healthier diet, learn a new language, spend less time on social media, stop taking out your frustrations on those who love you, and avoid being triggered by others? Who doesn’t? Our bad (and good) habits come from what we learned when we were too young to understand. It’s difficult, but we can understand and change our habits.
Getting along with those crazy people in your life
My husband says that everyone is weird in their own way, so you need to find others who are compatibly weird. Unfortunately, you can’t always choose who you interact with — but you can employ strategies to get along with them by understanding that how they behave isn’t personal. As for the others, you’re under no obligation to remain in toxic, so-called friendships.
Taking time for self-care
Rudeness from strangers… political polarization… road rage… job stress… Some think that life has become more complicated than humans are able to deal with. So how do you cope? By finding what grounds and relaxes you, be it walks in nature, scheduling a spa day, creative projects, taking a hot bath, meditating, or reading a good book. You need to be good to yourself so you can be at your best for others.
If you’re a woman who needs a helping hand and a kind heart to guide you toward becoming the best version of yourself that you can be, then contact me today to schedule a complimentary get-acquainted session.
You, my sister, are stronger than you know!